the end of november
it is late. had a cold this week, thought it was beat but then Dan got it, now i'm afraid we're sharing. not bad though, just a sore throat.
the end of november is hard. things get cold and the days shrink right down to nothing. finding myself in a sort of limbo, and though the lack of responsibility is nice, the uncertainty is just hell. waiting to hear about a job which could land me in Toronto in the new year; seems likely but i think it could still go either way, and with the waiting come unwelcome anxieties. toronto would be good, job would be good, the opportunities that come with it even better. worry though about losing 3 years of vancouver contacts, not to mention a few friends. could come back some day i suppose, an keep in touch with the good ones, but still... this is my home. and not wanting to take new work for fear of being unable to finish, but being fairly broke and with christmas fast approaching... sadly i also avoided finding work the last couple of weeks, burnt out somewhat after finishing a fairly intense project (my directorial debut*), which culminated in a 50-hour grind compositing session. all told that took 3 almost months, built up to a nice high at the end; but the crash afterwards has been brutal, and the end of november finds me once again wondering what in the hell to do next. that certain elements are out of my hands is rough, but as noted the (perceived) lack of responsibility is nice.
*Right; I have now directed a hip-hop video. Bring on the bitches n bling. i saw it on Rapcity once, and that was pretty cool. it's online if you're interested, get quicktime and watch it here.
if all goes well i'll be returning to ottawa for the holidays, driving back mid-december with dan, who's also moving back east. he's bummed at not really giving the acting thing a shot, but also ready to go home for a bit and rethink the next part. we've had a good time, will miss living with him wherever i am next year. expect to leave BC on the 17th, which should put us home midweek before christmas. mild panic at the notion of packing up and moving myself and all my belongings inside of 3 weeks, but utilizing as much healthy denial as i can muster and so far that's workin just fine. if only i didn't have this f*!&in sore throat. i am going to bed. g'night.


saturday night
i am at work. that is, i am at home, but i am working. later i will stop working... but i will still be at work. i wake up in the morning in my office, 3m from the desk (about equidistant to the toilet). there's no leaving to go off to work in the morning, nor is there getting to go home at the end of the day. i drink a lot of coffee and waste a lot of time. working from home absolutely sucks.
however, procrastination aside i occasionally get things done, and sometimes good things come of it. the fx heavy-video i've been wrestling with forever is almost in the can (shockingly bad), and up next i get to play a bit; the test below was for an animated video i'm gonna direct. it's a track by Sweatshop Union (vancouver hip-hop, w/battleaxe; we(FK)'ve done their two prior videos, one of which earned us an MMVA nod), and we got videofact, which is pretty cool. i mean, i've been watching muchmusic since i was twelve; now they're giving me money to make a four-minute hip-hop cartoon. this, i think, will be awesome. even if i'm working at home.
please nobody tell them i'm not an animator.


this is from a couple weeks ago

test for a video we might do.


burning a disc of 2nd video now, sweatshop union; it's finishing, which always seems to take longer than the initial writing part of the whole process. but it looks great, really pleased. just one left now, kia kidiri. not bad, it's coming together, though a lot more work than the previous two; more footage, more cuts, more fx. zoinks!
disc has popped. all is well.
played cards w/ jeff & fabiola & co. saturday, 4 games till 4am. end of this week they're moving to saskatchewan, the house we lived in is sold. saw megan on friday too, lunch. she is good. dan has a friend in town now so our apartments one heavy, though there's plenty of room. darcy is a fine chap from ontario, cuts hair for a living. used to be in IT.
finally shaved off winter layer of fur from my head, wearing shorts and accepting summer for what it is: nice out.


deep in music video land. first one went smoothly, but was crap; director was fired and i've recut, is now improved, remaster on the weekend. i've assembled the 2nd and it looks great, footage is really nice. big empty mansion in shaughnessy, anamorphic, lotsa coverage lotsa extras. it's already fun. 3rd video has me a bit more concerned, many FX... but will deal with it upon arrival.
as always, unsure of exactly what to do next. living with d is fun, but i'm really carrying him... would likely be better off on my own, though that would condemn him to the long flight back kanataways. is a tough call.
hoping to be back in ottawa this summer, even for a weekend. am working it out. really enjoyed owning mahony, have seen it twice now. have fixed the dates on this page from yymmdd to mmddyy. still haven't shaved.


tuesday now
so i started an entry (11 minutes ago), but then stupid human tricks came on and i was distracted. came back to it, realized i had nothing to say, and closed 'blog.html' without saving. of course, now i'm going again, because it's been a while and i'm sure something will come to me.
i've written a script. i don't know if i'll shoot it. but it's written. now i'm cutting music videos again, three back to back this month. rushes on wednesday. cutting the short was a fine change of pace, but not particularly interesting... building a website too, but nothing to point at. excited about the prospect of a new mightyguy comic or two...
i don't want cable anymore. anything worth watching is or will be available on disc. i'd accomplish a lot more. my pale skin would tan a healthy glow and my sperm count would skyrocket. will see. i know i could just stop watching it... but that's unlikely. conan o'brien is on now. it's a rerun. he's in toronto. the TV is on a lazy-susan so i can see it when i'm at my desk. (in mild defense, i also use it as a video monitor). while i cut television commercials. sigh.
that was a complicated paragraph. i would like to go away on a vacation. saw goodbye lenin! w/ kelly on sunday, wasn't bad. enjoying the works of michel gondry, master & commander was actually pretty good too, not much bullshit, just guys on boats; cool. i'm getting some serious rocker hair going... hesitant to shave for summer. should probably stop hibernating sooner or later though.
i'm done now. hello to all, hope you are well. i'm sure there will be more at some point.


i don't have the moustache anymore. well i do, but the beard kind of hides it. getting pretty shaggy in fact. cutting a short, writing, enjoying the works of sergio leone. making sure new blog works. i like the word blog, appreciate that there's now a word for this.


two or three months ago i quit my job. today was my last day. this has me excited. i'm still working with a lot of the same people, but in a slightly different capacity. and i'm not in an office. this is rad.
i have switched to a mac. it is magnificent.
this week i built myself a desk out of pine and brackets.
tonight i'm enjoying the jon spencer blues explosion and otis redding.
it's these simple pleasures easing me through.


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